ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
