More tranny stories later!
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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