Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Randomize
