I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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