My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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