Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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