She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Randomize
