i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
