How'd it feel making her break her religion?
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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