Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
