you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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