i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Randomize
