Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
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