wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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