Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
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