he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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