You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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