He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
