I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
