New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I've blown a few things in my day
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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