In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
