Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Life without a bra equals bliss.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
