Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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