so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
