Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I party with great urgency now.
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