i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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