yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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