Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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