You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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