what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
