Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize