Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
