so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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