He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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