Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
