I wanna bring you to show and tell
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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