Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
