I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
