I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
