never play flip cup with pint glasses
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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