you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
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