Swine flu is the new snow day.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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