Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
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