Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Randomize
