All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Randomize
