I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Randomize
