I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
