Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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