I want to stick my p in your. b.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
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