Having a random hookup so left but love u
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
